Second Person

Second Person

Share this post

Second Person
Second Person
Not a Dating Cookbook
Copy link
Facebook
Email
Notes
More

Not a Dating Cookbook

Why I'm not writing listicles of dating advice, and why you shouldn't be reading them.

Sep 30, 2024
∙ Paid
18

Share this post

Second Person
Second Person
Not a Dating Cookbook
Copy link
Facebook
Email
Notes
More
Share

Instructions Unclear

Isn’t it strange that most dating books are shelved in the self-help section? People don’t read science books for lab setup instructions or history books only when they’re personally attempting to conquer Carthage. But they expect dating essays to be written like an online recipe: a self-deprecating story you scroll past, an assurance that things will turn out well, and, finally, a list of specific instructions.

Here’s the description of the first sponsored result for “dating book” on Amazon:

My secret formula to attract 83% more charming gentlemen and dreamy girls to Second Person is to write the exact opposite of whatever that is.

Instead, this is going to be a blog about self-knowledge: seeing your dating self and your path ahead with clarity. Self-discovery is a long journey. Let’s start with this question:

Keep reading with a 7-day free trial

Subscribe to Second Person to keep reading this post and get 7 days of free access to the full post archives.

Already a paid subscriber? Sign in
© 2025 Jacob Falkovich
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start writingGet the app
Substack is the home for great culture

Share

Copy link
Facebook
Email
Notes
More